Almost Summer, looking back and feeling nostalgic. Need to escape.
I didn’t binge today. it was hard of course. I even put back one food from the shopping basket when I was at the store. I feel lost when I’m buying food. I’m either buying junk or just water and apples.
at least will wake up more or less feeling physically ok at 5 am when I have to go back. no burps and bloating tomorrow.
Step out of your cage
And onto the stage
It’s time to start
Playing your part
Open the gates
Open your mind
Freedom’s a state
haven’t binged yet. I just told myself that I don’t want to eat at all. not far from truth, as it’s very hot. but when parents went outside I thought of binging and purging just to get rid of some triggering foods. didn’t do that though. but now I don’t know what to do. I’m tired. I’m really tired. annoyed. every day I have to deal with this crap.
it’ll be ok only when I say that I don’t want to cause pain to myself and feel bad, as well as run away from pure feelings of what’s happening at present instead of just I don’t want to get fat
as the main reason why I don’t want to binge.
had to wake up today. now there’s that chocolate on my desk left from yesterday. untouched. if I eat it, I’ll binge.